Do It Yourself Declare Kit
I’ve now seen quite a few people in the Independent Field comment or complain that the Church was not declaring them in a reasonable time frame, if at all. But what if you need that declare to get into the latest Independent Field party or secret gathering? It’s not fair that you should have to wait. So here at the Martin Luther blog, we’ve solved that problem for you: Here for the first time ever is the Do-It-Yourself Declare Kit! No more waiting in line at your local Ethics Officer’s or MAA’s office. No more feeling like a second class Independent. Now you too can be part of the “Out Crowd”. Just download your copy of the official Do-It-Yourself Declare Kit, print it out, fill in your name, check off your particular crime, and you’re there! No delays, no waiting! Put goldenrod paper in your printer to make it look even more official!
LAND ORGANIZATION PENNANT CONDITIONS ORDER 666 DATE: ___________________ BPI ____________________________________ (your name here) is hereby declared a SUPPRESSIVE PERSON. Reason (Choose One): _____ Said or thought that David Miscavige was wrong about something. _____ Said or thought that David Miscavige did something wrong. _____ Said or thought David Miscavige was a meanie. _____ Has or had disagreements with David Miscavige _____ Said or thought that the Church was incorrect about something. _____ Said or thought that the Church did something wrong. _____ Has or had disagreements with the Church _____ Refused to cough up cash when the Church asked _____ Had something bad come up in a sec check _____ Read a newspaper. _____ Read anything on the Internet. _____ Is a current member of the Church in good standing _____ Some other random reason. The practice of disconnection was cancelled in the Church in 1968. Therefore, anyone who has ever known or communicated with this person is forbidden from doing so in the future, on threat of immediate declare and expulsion. Also you will go to hell. His/her only terminal is David Miscavige, since the International Justice Chief is probably in the RPF and will never be replaced. J. Random Staff Member for the Church of Scn International CSI:XX:xx Double secret copyright, no backs by the Church of Scn International